Overheard at local bars:

Scene 1:

"Why are you knitting?"

"Because I like to."

"How old are you?"

"That's rude, so I'm not telling you."

"Do you like to dance?"

"I've been known to dance."

"Will you buy me a beer?"

"No."

Scene 2:

"You're the knitting lady."

"Yes, I am."

"Will you make me a hat?"

"Sure, for $150."

"$150? Are you crazy?"

"No, but my time is worth something. Why would I make a hat for someone I don't know? Buy one at a craft sale."

Scene 3:

"You are so pretty!"

"Thank you, I know."

"No, really. You are very pretty."

"Thank you, I know."

To a third person: "Isn't she pretty?"

Third person: "Yes, she is. And you don't stand a chance. But, she's nice, too."

Scene 4:

"Are you going out with him?"

"Let's just say I've applied for the position."

"But, you're the knitting lady."

"What does that have to do with anything?"