I had a complete and total meltdown at work today. This was a long time coming. I've been pretty unhappy for about three months now. The trigger? One poorly crafted sentence in an email.
How sad is that?
I love email. Really, I do. But, there's this woman, see, who fired off a message that 16 hours later, when I read it, made me cry for - get this - six and a half hours! Yup, I sobbed quietly, at my desk, for most of the day.
The message said basically: "You screwed up, we need to talk about how incompetent you are."
What she meant: "There was an error tonight, and obviously something is being missed. How can we correct this process?"
What I interpreted: "My cover is blown. I have no idea what I'm doing, and my faking it isn't doing the trick."
And, hello! Haven't I said loudly and clearly that just following the steps isn't enough!!!!"
Need I discuss how embarrassed I am? I think not.
I really try to keep the crazy out of the office, but today it totally snuck up on me.
My poor boss (she did not send this message) was totally flummoxed, and did her best to ignore me all day. I don't blame her. Tomorrow morning, we are going to have a huge talk. I will probably cry again.
Sh*t, I'm crying now just thinking about it. I'm too upset to even knit, which is a sad state of affairs.