Sunday, April 29, 2007

Dating can be fun, maybe.

Sometimes, I do it right.

Meet a fellow and he chats me up.

I get his phone number. Call him. 'Cuz I only take numbers when I mean to call.

Meet him at a neutral location.

He shows up.

I have a good time. I DO NOT KNIT, even though Luke the bartender asks where my knitting is. Regale him with stories. Properly edited, of course.

I suggest ending the date at an appropriate time. IT IS SUNDAY, after all.

I allow him to drive me to a convenient location close to my house where he drops me off (I've had my fair share of stalker scares).

While in the car, I think I may be old enough to be his mom. Well, close. I'm definitely older. I also think "I have never been in the cool car with the tinted windows and reverbing bass before, this is fun, too bad the song is about a stripper." I think I say that out loud.

I did say it out loud, and he responds about asking what kind of music I like. I say something about being a sucker for a sad country song. I am soooo not hip. He responds by asking for clarification: do I prefer Merle or Waylon. This pleases me, as I adore Waylon, Willie and the boys, and we didn't even get close to talking about music when the official date part was going on.

We smooch (well, I kissed him, because I was so pleased about being in a cool car), and make plans to talk later in the week. Something about a new Spiderman movie coming out.

I waltz home, thinking "this is great, this is fun."

I get home and think "he's cute, but dumb as a post".

And, that's harsh. He's not dumb at all, I'm sure of it. He's kind, and hard-working, and a good listener, and all the good things a man should be. I even mentioned the "fiber-arts" a couple times, and he didn't even raise an eyebrow.

This boy has potential. Why am I sad that his eyes aren't blue? Brown is just as fine, especially when those eyes are looking at me.


Deborah Cryderman said...

Okay - so glad I'm not the only one who can find a reason for things to not work. Like brown eyes. Or a crooked nose. Or maybe one tooth that's funny. Why do we DO that???

Kiss him again and I bet his eye colour won't matter.

Misstea said...

Oh, I'm as superficial as they come. And, not shy about it either. Why do we do it? Fear of rejection. It's easier to write someone off as unsuitable because of a couple little things than to get involved and have him break your heart later on. That completely defeats the purpose of putting ourselves out there to look for someone, but who says emotions are rational?

The more I roll that evening around in my head, the happier I am about it. He's not the usual kind of guy I attract, and maybe that's why he is so attractive to me.

In a word, the entire evening was simple. And not in a "lower-than-average intelligence" kind of way. Rather, it was simple in terms of behaviour and expectations. I was truly myself. Not a manic entertainer, not a uber-serious professional, or ultra hot-and-young trophy date (my three most common roles) but rather, simply, me. Emotionally and physically strong, passionate about the things I love, and always ready for a laugh. I don't have anything to lose (not that I ever did) but I really, truly know that now. I've defined my expectations to myself, and now I'm going to find what I want.

As I said to J earlier tonight, I'm tired of feeling bad about treating men like shit. It's time to be a little more choosy (while still taking a chance on someone), a little more respectful, and in turn, I will be treating myself better.

And, like the ads say, I'm worth it.